This 4th of July I’ll Do What’s Best For Me

Good morning Beautiful Souls and Happy 4th of July.

Today I’m struggling because as you already know my best friend lost her battle with cancer and I spend every 4th with her.

I was going to go hang out at her house like I always do because that’s what she would have wanted. It’s also my first 4th being a single lady and that’s where the shit just gets weird.

You see a little birdie told me that my ex just might show up at my best friends house today. I was super confused because I can’t imagine going and hanging out with his best friend.

But none the less after all I’ve been through in the last 9 months I thought there just might be some truth to this rumor.

So instead of jumping to conclusions I send my ex a text and ask him if he plans on going to my friends house.

(Disclaimer our husbands only hung out with each other because we made them #TruthsWithTayTay)

And………………..

He says yes!

I’m pretty sure when you break up, that you don’t attend the same holiday parties anymore.

So not only am I missing my best friend I’m also going to miss celebrating with her family because he wants to be there?!?!?

So this year I won’t be doing what I always do because I refuse to play these games. I’m not spending the 4th with my ex at a party that we’ve gone to together for years. That’s just weird!

I’ll celebrate Renee’ because that’s what I always did, she would want me to have fun today

#boundaries

One day this will all be behind me and I won’t ever have to feel like this again.

This year I’m going to do what’s best for me And I’m not looking back

Stop giving your power away and never hang out with those who don’t celebrate your awesomeness

Happy 4th Friends I love you

The real reason you keep giving your power away

I used to be just like you!

I’m living proof that you can change your life by changing your mind.

I was wondering through my life aimlessly and I felt so disconnected from my spirit I wasn’t even sure if she was still inside of me.

I would sometimes hear a voice whisper to me and I would wonder where she was hiding.

As I began to strengthen my spirit I found myself on a new adventure and it turned out to be the most important job of my entire life.

My gift comes in the form of being real and after years of trying to escape I finally embraced it.

I learned how to look within. I stopped blaming everyone else for where my life was and I took responsibility for myself.

I knew that I was the truly the only person in this entire world that I could control so I set out to make friends with my heart for the first time in my entire life.

It’s not easy to look within because most of us didn’t have enlightened parents. But I’m here to tell you that if your willing to master your own darkness that there’s a light on the other side that shines so bright that you’ll never feel alone again.

There’s a place deep inside you that’s so full of love that it can be scary and overwhelming. There’s a place of peace right on the other side of fear and it’s the most glorious feeling in the entire world.

But you have to learn how to stop caring what other people think. You’ve got to learn why you are on this earth and then you’ve got to give your gift away.

Opinions are like assholes and everyone has one. But you don’t have to own others views of you. You don’t have to wear the labels that keep you small, because you can learn a new way.

Every single bit of my pain has brought me to this very moment. I no longer resent anything negative that’s happened to me because it’s all a part of who I am.

I couldn’t be me without every single one of my life experiences.

What an amazing feeling it is to stand in the dark and know that no matter what your going to be ok.

When you know who you are at the core of your being no one can take your power away.

True power comes from showing up and being you without any apologies ever.

True power comes from speaking truth to bullshit.

True power comes from building others up.

The world doesn’t need more followers it need more leaders and I am here to lead you to the light.

The real reason you give your power away is simply because you haven’t learned how to love you!

Peace God Bless Namaste

💜 Tay Tay

Spiritual life coach

My journey from girl to women to Goddess

Once upon a time there was a girl. She always marched to the beat of her own drummer. Never really fitting in, and never really trying too. She knew that she was different all along, and that’s how it was supposed to be.

She had passion in her soul, and she knew that she would have to honor it and nurture it, in order for it to survive. There would be many lessons to learn along the way. Some of the lessons would fill her heart and make her soul sing hallelujah. And then, some of the lessons would almost tear her apart. They would make her want her want to give up because, they hurt so bad.

She never traveled the easy path, because she was a bit defiant and wild, but she loved that about herself. Those very attributes were some of her most valuable gifts. The things that made her different, also made her stronger.

She’s passionate about making a difference in the world, by sharing her stories, in a vulnerable, transparent manner.

For this is where she finds the healing.

This is where she finds the love.

This is where the peace lies.

This is where she leaves a legacy, by helping one soul at a time.

She’s no Mother Theresa but she going to do some pretty amazing things!

“Without rain nothing grows, learn to embrace the storms in your life”

Tavia Hayduk

Spiritual Life Coach

Currently accepting new clients

Peace God Bless Namaste

Connect with me on social media

I’m learning how to use my heart as a compass

When she realized that she was living through it, she let go of the need to understand it and used her heart 💜 as a compass

Rebecca Campbell

The end is near and I’m ready for it to all

Be over. This has been one of the longest years of my entire life.

I’ve been through more stuff this year then my entire life combined and I’m still standing.

You see if we spend to much time trying to figure out why these things happen we will surely drive ourselves insane.

I’ve had to learn to open my heart again while it’s in the process of healing itself. I’ve had to to learn that sometimes we don’t really know people until we decide to leave them.

I’ve had to let go of my best friend and watch her slowly lose her battle with an awful disease.

I had the most horrible accident that one could have to their teeth and face, and it left me with a fractured septum and no front teeth. I looked like a monster for a couple of weeks because my teeth busted through my lips.

I’ve had to defend myself continuously from lies and accusations that aren’t even close to the truth from someone that I never thought would treat me this bad in a million years.

I’ve found out more secrets then I ever thought were possible about someone that I loved and cherished for many years.

I’ve had to live out of my car and at my moms house for the last 8 months while all of my belongings except for some clothes are at my house.

I’ve been through hell and back this year but I’m still here. While my hearts been shattered my souls being renewed. There were times this year when I felt so alone, so betrayed, so abandoned.

And all the while this was going on I had to keep working and living my daily life. I have to show my daughter what it looks like to never give up no matter how hard it gets. I’m a single mom now with lots of bills and a $20,000 debt for my teeth.

I have to teach her perseverance and self love and the most important thing of all is what love should look like.

I have to teach about boundaries, and respect and loyalty. I have to teach her that a marriage is a sacred union between 2 people only.

I have to show her what wasn’t shown to me.

She’s always watching me. She’s seeing what I tolerate when it comes to men and she’s learning how to love by what’s going on in her own home. She will pick her man based on what she’s learned about love.

We either repeat the dysfunction of our parents and grandparents marriages, or we repeat the love story that they’ve shown us.

I decided it was time to create a new normal for my family. One where we learn to walk away from anything that’s not unconditional love.

When you go through the storms of life and you feel as though your barely treading water, don’t you dare quit.

Don’t you dare give up. You keep on going and very very soon you will be rewarded for creating a new life.

In just 2 1/2 short months I will be able to close the book forever and begin writing a whole new story.

I can’t wait to share the details of my journey and help you live the life that you deserve.

I miss my friend so much that my heart will

Never be the same but I know she’s watching me and she’s proud of me. She understood every single detail of what I was going through and she was always there for me.

It is in times of great loss that we are being shaped into the people were supposed to be

💜 Tay Tay

Sister girlfriend I miss you so much, how do I do the 4th without you?

Pretty much every single 4th of July for as long as I can remember was spent at my best friends house.

Next week is the 4th and she’s not on earth anymore and I’m not sure what I’m going to do with myself.

I don’t know what to do without you sometimes. There’s such a big ass hole in my heart and I can’t even tell you how many times I wish I could call you.

Of course I still talk to you just like your here, but I don’t get to hear your funny advice and your laugh when it comes to the shit were talking about.

I don’t know how to do summer without you. You’ve been such a huge part of my life for so many years and I’m really struggling as it gets closer to the 4th.

I wish you were here to laugh and to cry with me. We truly embraced our outcast rolls together the last couple of years.

Between your cancer and my toothless divorce we were quite the pair. I’ll never forget the morning I called you to see if you wanted to go do something and you said “I just need to get my boobs” and I said “I just need to get my teeth” and then we both proceeded to laugh until we peed our pants.

Who would have thought we would say such things in our 40’s?!?!?!?

(I wish I would have shared that story at your funeral but I wasn’t prepared)

I miss you much my heart aches some days and other days I know your close by because I feel you.

But the pain of losing you remains the same. I will never ever be the same person because I don’t have you anymore. I’m so blessed that I got to spend so many years being your friend.

But I’m selfish and I want a million more years with you.

You know me and how I always told you there’s no such things as a coincidence, which is why God made us friends.

He knew that I would stand by you and help you fight your toughest battles, and he knew that you would do the same for me.

God makes us friends but our hearts fit together perfectly. You took care of everyone else and then I helped take care of you.

I miss laughing with you because it’s what we did best. We truly knew how to have a good time and to live in the moment.

You and I had life figured out a long time ago, which is another reason that we were so close. Material things didn’t matter to us, but the relationships in our lives meant everything.

I seriously haven’t decided if I’ll stay home and cry or I’ll go out and start a new tradition?

I don’t know how I’m going to be feeling that day, but one things for sure I’ll be missing you.

But I’m also very lucky to have all of these memories with you stored away in my heart.

I know you here even though your not. Of all the things I lost this year I miss you the most.

💔 Tay Tay

A good friend knows all your stories, a best friend helped you write them

The truth is we’ve all been hurt, some of us worse than others

How did Ernest Hemingway know me so well?

I read this and I found myself all in this quote.

Have you ever read something and felt very strongly about it? I loved this and felt it needed to be shared.

Notice that he says a feeling for beauty, not that you look beautiful. There’s a huge difference in looking beautiful and actually being beautiful. True beauty comes from the inside, it’s not egotistical. Beauty radiates from the inside out. It’s what you have to give that makes you beautiful, not what you can take.

Many times people are stuck on outward appearances. They think that having your hair and make up done make you beautiful. Sometimes people, even try to find beauty in where you live, or what you drive. But all of those things are egotistical, and materialistic. They come from the opposite of your heart, they come from your head.

Try as you might, to fill your life with things that will make you happy, and you will see that the happiness doesn’t last long. That’s because life isn’t about things, or what you’ve accomplished. Life is about making a difference in the world, even if it’s only in your world.

The next thing he talks about is the courage to take risks. Clearly everyone has different levels, of risks that they can take, but the point is they take them. I can name numerous people who changed history, and they didn’t do it my playing it safe.

Rosa Parks

Thomas Edison

Mother Theresa

Mozart

Oprah

Mark Zuckerberg

And literally millions more, but I think you get the point.

I can relate to what these people were thinking and feeling. I have the courage to take risks, and I also have the discipline to tell the truth.

Sometimes people don’t want to hear the truth, they only want to listen to their truths. But I don’t have time for those small minded people, I need to collaborate with the people of the world who have been hurt, and wounded, and who are ready to turn their vulnerabilities into their dreams.

The truth is we’ve all been hurt, and we’ve all felt pain in our lives. Some of us worse than others, but we’ve all been broken. But what really matters, what sets some people apart from the others, is what they’ve decided to do with their pain.

Are you the victim of your own life?

Or

Are you the hero who’s going to be the change?

When your ready for something new I am here to help you!

10 things to give up today to live a happier life

Everyone wants happiness but is everyone willing to admit that they are in control of their own happy?

  • Give up the need to be right. That’s a part of your ego and it’s never going to change, it’s always going to want to be right. But when it comes to living a happy fulfilled life then you can’t get stuck on a silly thing like being right. I’d much rather be happy then be right! Just remember that the choice is yours.
    Stop caring what other people think of you. It’s such a wasted energy and one that you can never control. If it’s someone you love then you most certainly should cherish and value their opinion. But, if it’s someone that doesn’t matter then let me tell you friends that their opinion sure as hell doesn’t matter. We spend way to much time caring about frivolous things that are out of our control. It’s time to focus on you.
    Give up judgment. We are all guilty of judging thats for sure, but we can also learn how to stop being so small minded. When were judging people we can’t love them and that’s a fact. I prefer love over judgment because it feels so much better and it makes up lighter instead of darker.
    Give up the need to people please. That was ok when you were younger and you didn’t know any better. Now your kids are watching you and it’s time to teach them how to stand up for themselves. Don’t you dare say yes to another thing that leaves you feeling empty or emotionally drained on the inside. (That’s called co-dependency)
    Let go of the need to have the last word. Who even cares? Seriously if your arguing with stupid your not going to get very far anyways. Having the last word is like arguing with a teenager and who wants to be a teenager? (Unless it’s a teenager in love 😍 wink wink)
    Give up over scheduling your life. We’re Not supposed to be busy all of the time. We need to learn how to have down time to chill and to renew our minds and our hearts. Make time to do nothing with yourself or with those that you love and your mood will change dramatically for the better. The world needs so much more chill.
    Give up negative self talk. Become aware of the gremlins in your mind and promise to not believe them ever again. Learning to love yourself is one of the most magical gifts you can ever give yourself and the world
    Give up control. It’s an illusion anyways. Learn how to accept every single situation for what it is. You are either heading towards the light or towards the dark and the choice is always yours. Accepting life the way it is versus the way it should be is a huge part of living awake and practicing consciousness.
  • Give up the pain in your heart. Take the time to learn what hurts you carry inside your own heart. Learn how to heal the broken child inside of you and then you will be able to create a new way of living and loving. It’s hard to go back and take the walls down but I promise you the love on the other side of fear is absolutely worth the work.
  • Give up the toxic people in your life. Wish them well, and then block and delete their asses. You must learn to go where your celebrated not where your controlled. Go where you can be yourself. You have to love yourself enough to recognize when your being mistreated and then you have to be strong enough to say good bye. There’s like 7 billion people in the world, stop wasting time with people that aren’t in your tribe. And stop making excuses for people that treat you like poop.

I hope you have an amazing week mines sure off to a great start.

I love you beautiful souls

Peace God Bless Namaste

💜 Tay Tay