September & Nothings Changed

Good Morning Dear Ones 🤍

I’ve been going through the longest break up of my entire life. Not one thing has gone the way they said it would go. I’ve never in my entire life felt so trapped and unable to move on, and at the same time I fully understand I’m doing this shit, no matter how long it takes.

It’s my daughters senior year and I wanted to create a healthy environment, with lots of love inside the walls of our home. Therefore I had to remove anyone and anything that stopped the flow of love. I started trying to leave him in January and it’s now September and he still lives here.

It’s by far the most awkward and weird situation I’ve ever had to live through. It’s bazaar and I’m often confused by what’s going on because his actions and his words never match.

He said we could agree to split everything and go our separate ways, but as you can see we’re still here. I eventually realized what I was going to have to do to leave this entanglement and I filed for Divorce.

Our lawyers could make a deal yesterday, because that’s what they do. That’s why you pay them, but when someone thinks you deserve nothing it’s going to last forever.

I needed to speak of some of this nonsense today, so next year when I look back at this time I can remember how far I’ve come.

Our first court date isn’t even until the middle of October, so we will be here together until then. I really wanted to work with him and be his friend and make Peyton’s senior year amazing in all the ways.

But after all the lies, all the deceit, all the stalking and the lack of boundaries, there’s no way we can be friends. I don’t hang out with people who treat me like shit and I’m not nice to those who have hidden agendas and intentions. I don’t trust liars and people who have zero capacity to accept responsibility for their secrets.

Living with someone you have blocked on all social media is a new kind of emotional intelligence or torture, I’m not sure which.

I have learned to heal my shit during this entire process and it’s fucking beautiful. While I have so many more details and stories to share with you, those will be coming out in my book. I’ve literally been through hell and back since 2020 and most of it was inside my own home.

For now understand that living in a war zone means it’s almost impossible to start the healing process. But nonetheless I will come out a warrior instead of a victim. One day it will end with a division of the marital assets and a divorce. What a gift we could give our daughter to agree and move on.

I will have love in this house one day and no grouchy old men! In the meantime send me some love, and know that you are not alone.

The divine feminine is rising and she brings with her a whole new level of love and light. She makes no apologies for loving with whole heart and understands the future that she will be blessed with.


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