Dear Soon To Be Ex-Husband

Dear Ex,

After 20 years Of taking care of you, I can honestly say that I NEVER even knew you until the last 2 years.

Oh my goodness have you run me through the ringer since I decided to leave your ass.

Nothing you say or do is true. You’ve been caught in so many lies that I had to start writing them down just to keep track.

It’s pretty shitty that I have to leave our house and uproot our beautiful daughter because you refuse to leave even though you told her and I that you would get an apartment. You even went as far as to buy new mattresses for the both of you for your new apartment, yet your still here.

But it’s ok because we’ll live out of bags at my moms house if that’s what it takes. I will go to any lengths to protect my children, as I always have and I always will.

You go to great lengths to protect yourself, your family and the money that you worship. You’ve always been this way, but you were my blind spot.

Today I get to write my blog from my own couch, but only because your out of town. In the last month you’ve done absolutely nothing to financially support my needs or the needs of our daughter.

When I ask you for money for my surgery which you are court ordered to pay you say to me you don’t feel comfortable giving it to me. So I add another $500 to my credit card because that’s what I have to do.

You leave town and you send me a text that says “I left you a Walmart gift card on the counter to buy food while I’m gone”

Well hells bells thanks a freaking lot. I’m guessing you think you did me a favor. I can hear your voice in my head right now “I didn’t have to give you a gift card Tavia you should be thankful”

That’s the first time in months you’ve given me anything and I wonder why you didn’t just leave me one of those crispy hundreds your carrying around?

You should know that I’m a survivor and I will survive this. You never laid your hands on me because your not that kind of a man, but I almost rather you did because those bruises would fade way faster then the words that haunt my heart spoken by you.

As I continue to find out more and more secrets about you and your life and your money, and your habits, I’m often caught off guard, knowing there’s still a shit ton more still to come.

But here’s the good news it doesn’t hurt anymore when I find out these things because now I wholeheartedly expect it from you.

I no longer see you the way I want to see you but rather I see you exactly as you are. Your half ass lies and your jacked up excuses can only get you so far before everything starts to fall apart.

Want to know why God Gifted me the ability to write?

So I could get the hell out of this marriage with a little bit of dignity left. He knew it would help me heal. He knew it would make me stronger and wiser and he also knew that I would be strong enough to walk away from you and all of your silly money.

As this continues I have to say that freedom of speech is my favorite amendment, because it gives me that ability to let it all out instead of keeping it all in. It’s my story to tell.

You and I both know that I’ve not even told the whole truth yet, and don’t think it has anything to do with wanting to protect you, because it doesn’t, but it does have everything in the world to do with keeping my beautiful girl safe and guarding her heart.

After years of making excuses for you I couldn’t be more excited to focus on our daughter and myself.

I think a real man would give his wife and daughter a safe place to live during a stormy time in their lives. We all know your family will take care of you just like they have for our entire marriage.

Everything’s always about you, which is exactly why you picked me to be your wife. You saw my empathetic heart and fell in love with it. You knew that I had something that you had never seen in your entire life and that it was the one thing you were missing.

Unconditional Love 💜💜💜💜💜

God is providing for me even when your not. I’m not afraid to take you on because I know the truth about both of our hearts and I know you better then you even know yourself. That’s what 20 years of loving someone will do to you.

I know you don’t want to help me with me anything right now and that’s ok because once we finally make our way into the courtroom it won’t matter what you “think” anymore.

Justice will be served one way or another.

Until then I’ll work my ass off to provide for my family. Even in pain and after emergency surgery I go into work because I have to make money to survive. I have to buy Christmas, buy food, buy clothes, put gas in my car, pay my rent at work and so much more.

Gods got my back and even when I’m weary I’ll never quit, I’ll never hide and I’ll never stop telling the truth.

Silence is breeding ground for shame and I will never be shamed or blamed by you again.

To my loyal readers I love you! Your support sees me through and this week I’ve had more love and support then ever.

Thank you friends

God bless

Peace

Namaste


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