Yesterday I wrote a blog about women. Even if your not willing to admit it, I was right on the money. Of course I have lots of articles, books, and blogs and Ted talks to back me up.
I don’t write about stuff that I haven’t studied. I take the time to investigate myself and then I share what I find with you. If your in a place of spiritual growth then this will resonate with you. If your in a place in your life where your not interested in being your own super hero, then this probably isn’t for you.
I can write these stories because I am living them, or I have in the past. I was tired of feeling the way I felt and blaming everyone else. For so many years I was the victim of my own life. I didn’t know that I was the reason I felt that way, and I sure as hell never believed that I could change it, nor did I want to change it.
I’m not blaming you or judging you for being bitchy or for being a nice lady. I’m here to teach you about yourself if you want to learn how to create a life with “real” connections.
Here’s an excerpt from a book by Harriet Lerner. It stirred my soul like no other. I felt as though she was describing myself, and my relationships perfectly, but she didn’t even know me.
Then I realized that she was also describing most of the people I know, along with a circular dance that I’m way to familiar with.
Most of us have received little help in learning to use our anger to clarify and strengthen ourselves and our relationships. Instead, our lessons have encouraged us to fear anger excessively, to deny it entirely, to displace it onto inappropriate targets, or to turn it against ourselves. We learn to deny that there is any cause for anger, to close our eyes to its true sources, or to vent ineffectively, in a manner that only maintains rather than challenges, the status quo. Let us begin to unlearn these things so that we can use our “anger energy” in the service of our own dignity and growth.
I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for dignity and personal self growth. I’m ready to let go of easy and comfortable to make other people happy, and I’m also ready to let go of being the angry girl.
You see it’s true what I wrote about yesterday, even though these styles are completely different, their exactly the same. They both leave us with feelings of resentment, bitterness, and more anger.
Do you want to know why?????
It’s because we’re trying to change other people, and we’re making ourselves responsible for their feelings. We must learn to focus on ourselves, which is the only person we can change.
We have to realize the role that we play in the intimate dance of relationships. We have to get real with ourselves, and then we have to learn to verbalize it in a healthy way, and after doing so try to stand our ground and maintain normalcy.
No longer will we suppress the feelings that are inside of us, nor will we explode acting like a crazy lady while never getting our point across.
I write to you today on behalf of a new generation of women. Ladies who choose to break the cycle of anger. Those who are bold enough to look within and to stand tall even if it means their relationships will change.
Because right on the other side of repression, and anger and fear is the ultimate gift of all.
The gift of showing up and being the change. The gift of creating the life you want, but didn’t have the tools to create until now. Teaching your best friends how to do the same thing, and saying a revolution of self love.
If your ready to get angry a new way reach out me I would love to grow with you💜