Good morning friends ☀️
reading Brene' Browns book Daring Greatly, and I absolutely love everything about it. (Disclaimer I also love everything about Brene' because she's authentic and real and the world needs more of her) The cover says this, "How the courage to be vulnerable transforms the way we live, Love, parent, and lead."
Does that not sound like the most beautiful thing?
It makes my heart flutter a little when I read it. The ability to be vulnerable might sound foreign to you, or maybe your really good at it, either way this book changes the game of life.
Every single time it comes to the way we communicate and love, were directed back to our childhoods. I'll be the first to admit that in the beginning I didn't want to talk about my past. I didn't really think it mattered.
I mean come on, I think I literally spent the first half of my life trying to escape the feelings of my childhood, and now you want me to investigate them?
You want to me to relate with them in order to grow?
You want me to come face to face with the very monsters I've been avoiding?
Because that's what life's all about!?!?!?!?
(Eye roll heavy sigh dirty 👀 look)
Ok if you say so 💜
The books says as children we found ways to protect ourselves against vulnerability. This means that we wanted to avoid pain, and to save ourselves. Which is pretty normal for any kid and it’s also the way our brains are made, to avoid pain.
So as children we went into survival mode in order to save ourselves. However, the problem is that some of us have never been able to come out of survival mode. We grew up thinking I’m never going to feel like that again, and we take that armor with us into our relationships.
We’re unaware of the total avoidance that is going on within ourselves. This is exactly why some marriages fail, and relationships don’t work out. We’re unwilling to try again, to trust again, to be vulnerable again. We turn away from the overwhelming sense of fear that’s inside us and we blame the other person.
All the while ensuring that our hearts can’t be seen because our armor is in place. I understand those feelings because I’ve had the same ones in the past.
I’ve had to unlearn Shame, and relearn self love. I’ve had to learn how to my mask off and be the real me. I might find myself afraid and putting my armor on 50 times a day, but you will also find me taking it back off for the 51st time.
I know what’s it’s like to be free from the gremlins in my mind. I know the peace that comes with being real, and being vulnerable, and I know that it’s worth it.
Where are you in your life today with your own set of armor?
Are you wearing it like a gladiator?
Are you ready to take your mask off?